Some days you have to face your fears and get REALLY uncomfortable. The part a lot of people don’t mention about facing your fears is that it puts you into that awful cold but sweaty fight or flight response. I hate it.
Some days nothing goes right.
Some days no matter what you do, people find ways to attack you, you find new ways to doubt yourself, and you are so over it.
Some days you are just so over all of it. And you’re ready to say “fuck this” and run away and hide.
…and then? Some days end with someone stopping to say, “Hey, you’re great. Thanks.” And then it changes your outlook on EVERYTHING and you think to yourself “Really? Oh. Okay then. I guess everything is okay” and then you feel fine.
Today I got in an argument with my boyfriend about double standards, trying to become better people, and (dis)respecting each other. After storming off, I made myself breakfast and read a book, desperately trying to stay mad without caving first as I always do. He came in the room, took in the scene, made a snarky comment, then made his own breakfast.
After eating he returned to apologize. And so did I. After which he revealed he had initially came in to apologize, but when he saw I was eating without him he got mad all over again. Don’t ask me why, but I found this to be the cutest and most hilarious thing.
Food and sharing meals together is kind of a big deal to both of us. I know it’s silly but I would have likely done the exact same thing. Hanger is also a factor in many (read: most, or even all) of our fights.